Saturday, 10/9 -- Gee, I don't remember planting 10,000 morning glory seeds in the yard.

Today I spent the afternoon with my lovely sister Connie and our good friend Matt. They helped us cut through the jungle that was our yard. It looks like a brand new yard, it's amazing.

The young hummingbird is now long gone. We haven't seen hide nor feather of her for more than two weeks now. Hopefully she got the hint and flew south for the winter. We'd gladly keep her in the house for the winter, but the cats would be a little razzed by her buzzing around.

This weekend is glorious. I haven't felt this good since June. I look forward to the next couple of weeks with dread, as I've mentioned before. I also take great comfort that on the other side of the treatment I WILL feel this good again.

I will beat this disease.
I will regain my strength.
I will walk without resting.
I will drive a car again.
I will buy new clothes that fit me.
I will work and earn a living.
I will plant a garden.
I will eat without feeling sick.
I will eat Thanksgiving dinner (with turkey and all the trimmings).
I will decorate the Christmas tree this year.
I will be able to have intelligent conversations about anything other than cancer.
I will regain my life.
I will love my life even more because (insert cliche here).
And I will see Penn State and Joe Paterno have a winning season sometime in the future.

All this and much more. Stay tuned.

Friday, 10/8 - I got the news today, oh boy...

On Monday I'll be starting two more cycles of chemo using the same drugs that I received before. They say I've had such an unusually positive response on this treatment that it may take care of that last 10% of active cancer.

Reasons this sucks:
* I wanted more time to recover before starting any kind of further treatment.
* I was hoping to receive drugs that are less harsh than Cisplatin and VP –16.
* I was hoping for a once a week treatment that would allow me to regain some normal activity.
* I hate the side effects. It'll be another two months before my hair grows back.

Reasons that this is "good":
* I know what to expect from these drugs, side effects won't be new and surprising.
* I want to start soon to GET IT OVER WITH.
* Other chemo drugs can have serious, permanent side effects. For me, not these ones.
* These drugs have a good chance of working.

In other encouraging news, the Sun could explode at any time making all of this moot.

"Moot" is a great word, isn't it?

More about yesterday's adventure. I went with a good friend (Joe) on a long ride through South and Central Jersey. From Upper Darby to a kayak store outside of Atlantic City, up to Matawan and Sandy Hook. Then home. Nearly a 12 hour trip.

Matawan is where in 1916 there was a series of inland shark attacks that inspired the story of Jaws. Inland, not "on land". We saw the river and the town, and moved on.

Sandy Hook seashore is a beautiful spot; at least it is off-season. Neither of us had ever been there before. You can see the NYC skyline from the beach. Very cool at sunset with the sunlight reflecting off the skyscrapers.

Along the way we talked about anything and everything. 11 hours in a car with a close friend can cause all kinds of deep conversations to manifest. Good for the mind, good for the soul. We both had a good day of it.

Thursday, 10/7 -- Jeff is really the 2nd name in medicine.

First off, I appologize to all the people to whom I owe an e-mail. Thank you all for your supportive messages, I will respond as soon as I can.

The call I was waiting for yesterday never came. However, the nurse practitioner that has been working closely with my doctor called around 8:00 pm to tell us the scoop.

They aren't expecting to hear back from Dr Einhorn and the other consultations until Friday. I guess no one has a quick answer to my situation because I'm so unusual.

So it's another waiting game to find out if I'm going to be poisoned again on Monday. Until Monday, all I can do is enjoy my increased energy.

Yesterday afternoon we visited a nutritionist at Thomas Jefferson University and Hospital. Remember their ad campaign, the first name in medicine is "Jeff", not "Thomas". Anyway, our meeting was very good. Turns out the dietary approach we were planning is right on target. I was afraid that I was leading myself down the wrong path, missing something important. Nope.

More on the meeting later. I'm headed out of the house today on an adventure. More on that later too.

Wednesday, 10/6 -- 90% success, 10% other

At yesterday's appointment we got some news. Some good, some not-so-good.

The doctor met with the radiologist on Monday and they reviewed all the scans. They determined that I still have "active disease" in my lungs and along the middle of my spine. That's the bad news.

The good news is that my response to the chemo has been impressive. About 90% of the tumors are now gone. That's fantastic response for a tumor that is as stubborn as Sertoli.

Also good: Because I've had such a strong response, there's reason to believe that the last 10% of the cancer will respond to more chemo.

There's more bad news. More chemo. Maybe as soon as this coming Monday.

As of 12:00 today, we're waiting by the phone to hear from the doctor. He's supposed to chat with Dr Einhorn and others to get their suggestions for further treatment. What kinds of chemo drugs, how often do I get them and when.

He told us to plan for chemo to start on Monday. Today we're supposed to find out more specific info.

How am I? Scared, frustrated, sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I dread Monday. I have no idea what new side effects I'm going to be dealing with. I'm scared that I'm going to have to fight while I'm still weak. I knew that I'd have to receive further treatment, but I thought that I'd have more time to get stronger.

At this rate, I'm never going to get my garlic planted before the first frost. RATS!

I'll post more info after I've spoken to the doc.

Tuesday, 10/5 -- Your chance to take a swing at Bush.

Day Two of my uncharted exploration of recovery time. Things are going well.

I've gone for walks around the neighborhood, each time going just a little bit farther. The hills are tough. The hills are very tough. Damn those hills. I do get winded from those damned hills. I'm not sure how much of it is my blood and how much of it is my muscle.

My big plans for the day: Unload the dishwasher, take a shower, go for a short walk, visit the doctor and go to my group meeting at the Wellness Community. It's a big day. Only two weeks ago just brushing my teeth was enough to make me tired. No kidding.

Today's doctor's visit may produce some answers to Friday's questions and uncertainties. I doubt it though. I think it won't be until later in the week or early next week that they have their info together. After all, I'm not their only patient.

On Saturday we're planning a backyard clean up. Anyone want to help?
The backyard has become overgrown in certain spots, mostly from neglect. Lyn and I want to slash most of the weeds to the ground and be done with it. A few bushes need to be trimmed as well. Not a big deal. It may take two hours, tops.

Hopefully the weather will be good.

If anyone would like some perennials, we have some up for grabs. You just have to dig them up and stick them in the ground at your house. The short list includes: pink peonies, irises of many colors, hostas, rose bushes and other assorted plants. They will all be in our way when we plant a veggie garden next year.

We also have a lot of free weeds that are up for grabs.

Here's an example of the overgrowth. This is our back door.

Monday, 10/4 -- Rock around the block.

Any requests for pictures, silly or otherwise? I'll dust off my digital camera and get cracking.


Went for a walk yesterday around the neighborhood. I suspected that I would only be able to do one or two blocks because of the hills, but we wound up doing about 4 blocks. Sure, not a whole heck of a lot compared to the distances I used to walk. It's a good starting point.

I hope to go trucking around again today. Maybe we'll go a block further.

I was tired after yesterday's walk, but I wasn't whipped. Plus it felt great to get the body moving.

This is Day One of my post-chemo life. I'll celebrate by wolfing down a McDonald's Chicken Tenders 10 pack. They have over 1,200 calories. I'm lovin' it. Of course, I'm kidding, I would never put that crap into my body even before I got sick.

In reference to yesterday's entry, here's a picture of a rutabaga and some pretty Swiss chard. The rutabaga hardly looks edible, but we should also consider the appearance of potatoes. Neither will win any beauty contests.

Sunday, 10/3 -- What's my e-mail address?

In case you were wondering: My e-mail address is hidden to prevent "spam". It is "etc@" this dot com. Hopefully you can figure it out. If not, post a comment on this site.

This weekend I've been having moments of clarity where I feel like my old self. They don't last very long, but they encourage me to keep striving towards my goals.

Lyn's been busy in the kitchen experimenting with "whole foods" recipes. Trying new ingredients is always fun, especially when the dishes turn out delicious. The latest was Swiss chard with black olives and feta. I never had Swiss chard before (I'm not big on greens) and I enjoyed it very much.

It's funny, as a former vegetarian and someone who has eaten a relatively healthy diet in recent years... there are lots of vegetables that I've never tried. Swiss chard and rutabaga for example. Endives, turnips, collard greens and kohlrabi are some others.


To use a tired cliche, tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life. Tomorrow will mark the longest I've gone without chemo since starting it in July. It feels like a milestone, no, it IS a milestone. I'll have to do something momentous, like put on pants or shave the 30 hairs that make up my beard.

So many possibilities.