Wednesday, 1/5 -- Ready... Set... sit. Good Monkey Boy.

Balance is the concept to concentrate on.
Harmony. Evenness. Fluidity.
Ying and Yang.

I want to find a balance in my recovery so that I don’t continue to push myself too hard. I have to let myself be a sick person, although I don’t think of myself in that way.

I am more confident than ever that good health will return to me. I need to be patient. I need to BE a patient. I have to let it happen in as much make it happen.

The equations are simple.
Normal Healing + Overconfidence = Eric in the hospital
Normal Healing + Pushing too hard = Eric in the hospital
Normal Healing + stepping back and resting = Eric’s continued recovery

Active rest. Full contact sleep. Turbo lounge wear.

It’s hard to know what your limits are without testing them. Unfortunately I stepped over the line a few times. But now I know.

I also know myself enough to be scared that I will hurt myself again. I’m just that dumb sometimes. It’s true.

I know these are some scattered thoughts here, but that’s ok for now. It’s a peak into my mind without having to touch any of the stinking goo that’s inside.