Monday, 2/14 -- More of the same. And we want to take a trip out to hug some trees.

Medically speaking, these past few weeks have been uncharted territory. There has been so much going on, and much of it has been hard to explain or make sense of.

I try to write in detail to tell you how I am physically, mentally and emotionally feeling. I think I do a pretty decent job of it. I also know that there is a lot of what I'm experiencing that I cannot put into words.

For example. I've talked about "Chemo Brain" in the past. Its a foggy condition in my head when I don't feel like myself. I don't think straight. My thoughts are clouded by a thickness that's hard to cut through. Half asleep, half awake.

I have that right now and I haven't had chemo in several weeks. What is causing it?
Mysteries of treatment.

And that's just one thing.
I still have the weakness and fatigue.
I still have dumbness in my hands and feet (the numb hands make for fun typing.)
My coughing has gotten worse, but cough syrup has helped that immensely.

Could the cough syrup be causing my fog? Possibly? I'm not going to stop taking it though.

Tomorrow is the weekly oncology appointment. We're going to go into great detail about my physical condition. I need to know how much of my condition is caused by my drugs, and how much is caused by the cancer itself.

If the cancer continues to advance, I want to know how that will happen. What physical changes will take place and how do we treat them.

And we may also decide to start a new form of chemo. The jury is out on that just yet.

Lyn and I want to plan a trip.
I want to go to Yosemite National Park in California. I've been there at least twice. Lyn's never been. I want to share with her the giant sequoia trees.
I want to touch them again and feel their power.

We need to talk to the oncologists and make sure that I can be well enough to travel.
I want to get strong enough to make this trip. So far, my body has been letting me down.